'I said no and ended the call': School principal demands mom work for free to help with school play, she refuses, principal blames her for production failure

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
May 14, 2024 9:00 AM EDT

It comes to no one's surprise that schools care much more about the sports programs than the arts. For some reason, it is assumed that the arts are not as important for kids' education as doing sports, and so the art programs get much less budget and attention in an unfortunate amount of schools.

The situation is no different in the school from this Reddit story, and the main problem might be with the school's principal. OP (original poster) is a mom who got a call from a school principal asking her to help with the school's production of Grease. The mom, whose kid doesn't even go to that school anymore, told the principal her rates and was surprised to learn that the principal was expecting her to do it for free, as a donation to the school.

Scroll down to read the mother's response. After you are done, click here for a story of a resident who had to deal with a stranger parking in their private spot.

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  • 01
    "I said no and ended the call"
    via Canva
  • 02
    School principal expects hours of my time plus supplies for free.
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 03
    I sew and crochet to a professional level. I occassionally take commissions, but I charge top dollar and don't do "mate's rates".
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 04
    Last week, I had a call from my daughter's old school. They're doing a production of Grease, and wanted 25 poodle skirts and 10 vests made by the end of July. I said I would check my
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 05
    calendar, and if I had time, I would provide a quote. There was a short silence, then the principal said "oh, we thought you'd be able to donate them."
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 06
    I asked her why she thought that, and she said "Other past parents make regular donations all the time. We haven't had anything from you."
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 07
    I asked her if she had any idea how much this would cost, and she said, "oh, maybe a couple of hundred dollars." I DID laugh at that point. I told her that, for a professional to make what she
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 08
    was asking for would probably cost about $4,000.00, including materials and labour. Principal said "that's ridiculous! I can get them from cheap company with an orange logo for about $10 each!".
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 09
    I suggested she should do that. THEN she asked if I'd pay for them since I wasn't prepared to donate my skills or material.
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 10
    I said no, and ended the phone call. She's contacted me four more times since, saying the production is at risk due to budget issues.
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 11
    I found out from another parent that the professional musicians she's tried to hire have refused to play for free, and have demanded payment up front due to issues with getting money from her in past years.
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 12
    I would normally be more sympathetic, but in my daughter's last year there, the school spent over $200,000 on a sport program that benefited about 10 kids (one of which WAS my daughter). At the same
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 13
    time, they pulled funding from the group of kids chosen to compete in a STEM challenge three weeks before they were due to go, cancelled a planned trip for the school band and closed one of the art studios.
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 14
    This was despite furious oppositon from the school community, and despite the fact that this is an expensive private school that advertises itself as having a strong focus on creative and performing arts.
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 15
    It seems her new policies are coming back to bite, because she hasn't been able to secure any support from the community or past families. Everyone had closed ranks and not single local business is prepared to put money in.
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 16
    SNOL ThaFoxThatRox · 1 day ago • Last week, I had a call from my daughter's old school. Your kid doesn't even go there anymore and they still have you on speed dial?!
    via u/ThaFoxThatRox
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    • Hungryandcomfused · 1 day ago Big shame for the kids but hopefully the school board will make note of this and replace her with someone less entitled, more budget conscious and solution focussed. Rather than
    via u/Hungryandcomfused
  • 18
    palming off her issues onto unassuming parents who already have budgets to meet, commitments to fulfill and raise kids! Good on you for standing your dig.
    via u/Hungryandcomfused
  • 19
    Fakeaccount979 · 1 day ago Principle thinks the sports is the most important part of school and everything else like actual education is secondary. Needs to be replaced for very skewed priorities.
    via u/Fakeaccount979
  • 20
    pshokoohi 1 day ago I'd go public. Say something to local news, rally the parents paying through the nose whose children's programs (that they brought their kids to that school for due to the school's misrepresentation) were inappropriately cancelled in
    via u/pshokoohi
  • 21
    direct contravention of not only what the school advertised but was had vocally been viewed as a misappropriation of funds. She'll be gone and changes will be made because parents who can afford expensive schooling can afford lawyers.
    via u/pshokoohi
  • 22
    TheHonPonderStibbons OP. 23 hr. ago Yeah we did all that. There - was a small uproar, but because it's a private school, the general community has a fairly poor view of the place anyway. My daughter was a full scholarship kid,
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 23
    but we still ended up paying close to $8,000 a year by the time we bought uniforms and paid for all the extra curricula activities. The overall wealth and entitlement of some of the families was obscene. Glad she's out of there now.
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 24
    Both Painter2466 · 21 hr. ago I looove private schools charging big bucks who then demand donations. My daughter went to one as a kindergartner. We were stretching to pay their tuition as it was when we were "invited" in to the Head and told they expected essentially a “donation” equivalent to 30% of the tuition. I didnt laugh at them, but we nodded, said "no" and left. They didnt bring it up again.
    via u/Both_Painter2466
  • 25
    TheHonPonderStibbons OP 20 hr. ago Our daughter would never have gone there, but they head hunted her based on her sporting and academic achievements. They initially offered a half scholarship, which we turned down, but when they reviewed her school results
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons
  • 26
    they called back and offered a full scholarship. Daughter really wanted to go, so we said yes. It was good for her, as it allowed her to pursue both her sport and academic goals. She got into the uni course she wanted AND represented the state one of her sports, but the whole thing just felt really....icky. SO much wasted wealth and resources. The rich really do live a different life.
    via u/TheHonPonderStibbons

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demands school play school drama principal work donations reddit story entitled Reddit mom weird money children entitled people
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